We all have an ideal list, a list we have toiled on and conditioned through time. A list that provides us a glimpse of a plausible dream. A dream that consists of not only “you” but an “us”. With it, we fathom an ideal person calling him or her your true love, sole partner or better half.
I too am guilty of this crime, time and time again have I sat down nonsensically scribbling away on a paper on what I want or need from her, what would make “us” happy, what would make “us” compliment or supplement each other. The physical (superficial) traits like height, skin complexion, hair color and body shape (figure). And the add-on or accessories like tattoos to piercings. And even on personality such as not bitchy, not possessive, not x or not y etc. Prerequisites created in static circumstances in order a create a projection of what to “look out” for.
These are subjective physical and personality traits extracted from ordinary individuals in various circumstances to create a “super” or “perfect” person ideal for you. For most of us, we will never met this super/perfect person in a lifetime not because they do not exist because our criteria is so absurdly rigorous that not many people can pass through it. Ask yourself, who in this real world is identical or even remotely close to the image or projection of your true love ? Can we ever find a person with looks of Jessica Alba and personality of Princess Diana?
End of the day, we all need to compromise or better yet throw that worn-out scribbled paper. Judge from your heart and not from your mind based on fallacious socially acceptable traits. If you let preconceived bias act as basis for your criteria for an ideal partner, you are just going to end up with someone “the world” would date rather than someone you would.