Category Archives: Emotional baggage

My femine side at work…..

Blissful Love

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Happiness always sneaks in a door you did not think was open

Life is strange. I love the roller coaster ride I have had so far. It’s a great story. With hindsight, the bad memories seem to perfectly compliment the good ones. Better yet, the good ones may actually taste sweeter. Maybe, that’s what keeps me going through the bad experiences in my life, the happiness that I know is round the corner, inevitable and always worth the rough ride.

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A Thin Line Between Love and Friendship

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I wanted to kiss her, but of course I didn’t. I wondered why I resisted, when in the past I had always followed my impulses with not much thought of consequences. Maybe because it didn’t feel like a game with her… the way it had with so many others before. Maybe because I had more to lose. Blurring the line between friendship & attraction was a surefire way to lose a friend.

live.laugh.love.locs

I must admit, I saw it coming. I had that uneasy feeling and a few of my close male friends have warned me about this inevitability. “You know guys and girls can’t be friends right? especially close friends.”  Maybe.

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Yours

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Perfectly said. Soooo me.

I tend to view the world with some sort of cynicism. I don’t gel well with people I’ve just met because I feel socially awkward around them. Sometimes, I can’t tell if I’m really that way or I make myself out to behave that way as a defense mechanism. Maybe both. I don’t really trust myself or people around me to let my guard down. I feel like the things I say or do may someday be used against me. I am nervous, my fight or flight mechanism is perpetually in overdrive.

Then there are certain people who come into my life and somehow manage to break my walls down, slowly but surely. And then the words are tumbling out of my mouth too quick and before I know it my entire being – my feelings, my thoughts, my memories, my secrets, my heart.. Everything is suddenly theirs to keep, to safeguard.

And then I get scared. Because those are the people who always end up leaving me, taking parts of me I never get back again.

We Wait to Fight – Battle Scars

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One would easily imagine that if you are extremely busy with work and you really didn’t have time for anything except finishing up your backlog of files, you wouldn’t be thinking about emotional stuff like this. But, I do albeit I know I shouldn’t.

You know that feeling when you’re just waiting, waiting to get home into your room, close the door, fall into bed, and just let out everything that you have kept in all day? Its been a long day, 14-16 hours of non-stop continuous work surely would make anyone tried and why would you be any different.

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I care

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Sometimes it’s easier to say you don’t care instead of trying to explain every reason you do.

I think end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing, where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, is usually a load of bull.

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A Lawyer’s Thoughts in 6 Minutes

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It been some time since my last post. (Un)fortunately, work has kept me quite busy. My firm decided to retain me and since then I have been under quite a bit of stress trying to meet my billing quotes. It seems like every single moment of my day (while I am awake) is billable whether its to file XXX or file YYYY and if I ain’t billing some client for some work done then I am wasting the company’s resources and time, which means I become a liability towards the company rather than an asset.

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Love Life

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Life changes every minute of every day. You lose friends and you gain friends. You realize your friend wasn’t ever really your friend, and that person you used to hate can make a really good friend. You look for love. You find love and you lose love. You realize all along that you’ve been loved. You laugh, you cry. You laugh so hard that you cry. You do this, you do that. You really wish you hadn’t done that. You then learn from that and are glad that you did. You have your ups and you have your downs. You see good movies and you see bad movies. You wonder if your life is just one big movie. You look at others and wish you were them. You then realize who they are and are glad that you’re you. You love life and you hate life. In the end, you just find yourself being happy to be living life, no matter what is thrown at you

courtesy of Eletheowl